How I’m Taking Care of My Mental Health During Pregnancy — From a Pregnancy Therapist

Surprise! I’m pregnant! I thought it would be fitting to share what I am doing as a therapist who is pregnant, who also works with pregnant clients. This isn’t my first time being pregnant, but I also wasn’t a therapist when I was pregnant with my first child. It’s a new perspective that I’m enjoying as I’m able to be a therapist in one role, and a pregnant client in another role with my own therapist (shout out to Bridget Balajadia!).

This might seem like a no-brainer, but just because I’m a therapist who works with pregnant clients, it definitely does not make me immune to my own emotional challenges in pregnancy. Sure, I may be more of aware of what I’m feeling, why I’m feeling it, and possible coping mechanisms- but it’s pretty hard to be your own unbiased therapist. Impossible actually.

So, with that being said, as a pregnancy therapist, I’d love to share my challenges and the real ways I’m taking care of my mental health during pregnancy.

Adjusting My Schedule and Setting Boundaries as a Pregnancy Therapist

Whew, first trimester! What a doozy. I’m currently 32 weeks while writing this blog, but let me tell you, the first trimester was not for the faint of heart. Along with not wanting to tell anyone I was pregnant yet- both friends and clients. The fatigue and nausea hit me hard during those first 14 weeks. I quickly had to pivot and make adjustments. No more than a few clients per day, a nap if warranted, and not being hard on myself when I physically couldn’t get anything else done. Since I work from home and all my clients are virtual, I’m usually doing things around the house in between appointments as well. Also, if you’ve ever been pregnant with a toddler, then you understand the struggle. If you haven’t, then let me explain it to you: survival mode. When my husband was busy working or out of the house, and I was alone with my 2yo we were utilizing a lot more screen time. Not something I felt great about, but I seriously couldn’t do much else. Oh, and did I mention having a supply of mints on my desk to eat during client sessions to help with the 24/7 nausea?

The second trimester was dreamy. Honestly. I had so much more energy and I felt like I could take on anything! I was able to see more clients during the day, I was motivated to work on my business more often, and I was scheduling more networking meetings outside the house. Good times, good times.

Now here we are in the 3rd trimester, 2 months from my “due date.” I’ve stopped taking new client referrals since I’ll be off for about 4 months, and because of this I’m naturally less busy. This is working out well because I can feel myself getting more tired again. I’m back to saying “no” to some meetings, setting boundaries with friends and family visits, and really protecting the energy I have right now. I’m saving my energy for client sessions, for my husband, and for my son.

Setting boundaries, adjusting schedules, and lowering expectations for yourself is something I talk with my clients about frequently when they’re pregnant. I’m here to tell you that it is so important, as I need to do the same.

Asking for Help and Not Feeling Guilty About It

This is a big one. We can’t talk about setting boundaries and lowering expectations without also acknowledging the guilt that can also accompany this. When we set boundaries, adjust our schedules, and lower our expectations, we are most likely doing less than we were before (I hope so, because that’s the goal). When we are doing less, we are probably asking for more help. And if not, I like to explore this a little deeper with my clients. “Why is asking for help uncomfortable? Do you have a support system to ask for help from? What would happen if you asked for more help?” More often than not, feelings of guilt, shame, or failure will rear their ugly heads when some clients feel the need to ask for help. I’ll admit, I’m not immune to this either! If you feel guilty asking for help and admitting you can’t do it all by yourself, then asking for help is great practice for you. If you’re surrounded by a loving support system, partner, and family, then you know they would love to help.

Let me explain why it’s good practice to ask for help. By asking for help when you need it AND your support system following through, you’re retraining your brain to see that it’s safe to ask for help. You’re creating a new “story,” and the more you write the same story, the better your brain remembers it. It shows your brain that there is no reason to keep feeling guilt, shame, or failure. The more you practice, the easier it gets. It’s something I am practicing too, and I’ll admit it’s not easy!

Leaning on the Tools I Recommend

Even as a pregnancy therapist, I benefit from talking to a therapist too. Highly recommend finding a therapist who is trained in this area of expertise. Look for someone who has the initials PMH-C after their name. This means the person is certified in perinatal mental health. If you’re wondering why it would be beneficial to start therapy while you’re pregnant, check out my previous blog on this topic.

Personally, I run a bit on the anxious side (my therapist is probably laughing right now!) and I find it helpful to talk to someone while pregnant to help with that anxiety. Also, full disclosure I had a miscarriage prior to this pregnancy, and this has made me much more anxious during this pregnancy. Check out my Instagram post about it here.

I also like to recommend mindset, mindfulness, and grounding tools during pregnancy. These can be helpful despite the type of birth you’re having. My favorite things to recommend are listening to birth affirmations, hypnobirthing tracks, and pregnancy meditations. I could do a whole blog on these things alone. They are powerful and can help change your subconscious messaging and beliefs about birth, which in turn affect how your brain and body react during labor. I am utilizing these myself. My favorites are the Gentlebirth App, “Mindful Hypnobirthing” by Sophie Fletcher, and pregnancy/muscle relaxation tracks on YouTube. I’ve also heard great things about the Christian Hypnobirthing app. In addition to these, practicing breathwork can be fantastic for anxiety in pregnancy, as well as training your breath for relaxation in labor.

I won’t get into this, but exercise is hugely beneficial for your mental health, whether you’re pregnant or not. Remember, your mind and body are connected, so anything that positively affects your mental health is going to benefit your body as well- and vice versa. And who doesn’t love that connection when they’re pregnant!

Planning Ahead for Postpartum Support

Part of protecting your mental health in pregnancy is planning ahead for postpartum. In my work as a pregnancy therapist, I encourage clients to think ahead about the postpartum transition. I’m doing the same.

As immediate postpartum can feel very raw, emotional, and vulnerable, I encourage clients to think about who they would feel comfortable helping them during this time. Reach out to those people in your life, and ask if they can be available. Also think ahead about boundaries for visitors. Do you want visitors in the hospital or at home? If so, how soon? Feel free to put up a sign on your front door for visitors that expresses the things your are comfortable with. For example, please wash your hands when you come in, please don’t kiss the baby, wear a mask, please don’t come in if you are sick etc. Another good one is to post a list on the fridge of things people can help with if they want to visit but aren’t sure how to help. This can also be helpful for a partner. Something like, “if you want to help please feel free to start a load of laundry, wash bottles or pump parts, make a meal, or pick up some groceries.”

I also encourage my clients to look up local providers they may need after birth. These can be things like lactation consultants, pelvic floor physical therapists, chiropractors who specialize with postpartum and infants, and/or bodyworkers who do the same. This may seem like overkill, but when you’re postpartum and trying to heal while keeping a new baby alive, finding these things can feel very overwhelming and downright impossible. Because I work in the birth world, I have a great list of these types of providers I’m already connected with, and therefore can refer local clients to the same ones.

Some clients may find it helpful to take a course about infant care during pregnancy. I love recommending Karrie Locher for this. If you don’t follow her on Instagram already, you should. I wish I had taken an infant class with my first pregnancy because I focused so much on a “good” labor and delivery, I sort of forgot about needing to know how to care for a baby (LOL). That being said, you will figure it out regardless, and I’m sure there are people who would be more than willing to show you the basics if you’re unsure! Luckily, this time around I already know most of this stuff, however every baby is different, and this next one will probably give me some surprises!

Conclusion: A Work in Progress, Even as a Pregnancy Therapist

This pregnancy has been a reminder that no amount of training or experience makes you immune to the emotional ups and downs of this season. As a pregnancy therapist, I’m constantly learning how to apply the same compassion, flexibility, and support to myself that I encourage in the clients I work with.

Taking care of your mental health during pregnancy doesn’t mean doing it perfectly—it means being honest with yourself, asking for help, and building in support before you desperately need it. That’s the heart of pregnancy therapy: making space for your full experience, even the messy, tender parts.

If you’re pregnant and feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or just curious about what emotional support might look like, I’d love to connect. I’m located in the Greater Sacramento Area and I offer online pregnancy therapy for women across California. Many of my clients are located in the Roseville, Sacramento, Folsom, and El Dorado Hills area. I’d be honored to walk alongside you through this season. Let’s chat!